Valentine’s Day might be designed to make single people feel badly about ourselves, but don’t let Hallmark and Jared be the boss of you. Be your own Valentine with these 9 ways to pamper yourself. An installment in the Happily Single series.

Pamper yourself and be your own Valentine this Valentine’s Day

February is Worst Month, and the only cure is to pamper yourself. It’s dark; it’s cold. You fall down on the ice and can’t fasten your bra for the better part of a week (sigh, that’s just me). And then there’s Valentine’s Day. For those of us single folk, it can feel like the worst day of the worst month. That is unacceptable, so I’m suggesting something else: be your own Valentine this Valentine’s Day. It’s time to pamper yourself.

No flowers candy for the singles? Nonsense

This is time for flowers and fancy chocolates. Or maybe an extravagant dinner to chase away the winter blahs. We have an entire industry devoted to this cure, and it’s designed to exclude single people. On Valentine’s Day, the coupled, and only the coupled, get showered with presents.

Our culture tells we singles that we shouldn’t have these things, because only a lover should bestow such treats. Giving them to ourselves, simply because we want them, is a bit sad, no? Maybe a dinged- up box of 50% off drug store candy, which we sheepishly buy at the auto checkout and shove into a bag, but that’s it. There’s a Single’s Awareness Day on February 15, but I’ve been single for ages, and I’ve only just heard of it. I don’t think that we need a consolation day, anyhow. Let’s get ourselves flowers and candy!

Be your own Valentine and pamper yourself!

 Be your own Valentine! Flowers and candy are nice. Don’t let Jared and Hallmark tell you what you can and cannot have when you want them.

Here are some ideas for ways to pamper yourself. They’re splurges, no doubt about it, and some of them aren’t cheap, but there’s something here for most budgets.

Pamper Yourself and Be Your Own Valentine

9 ways to pamper yourself and be your own Valentine on Valentine’s Day

1. Give yourself flowers

It’s winter. It’s dark. Get yourself some flowers. Put them in a vase and keep them somewhere you’ll see them. You don’t need to spend tons of money (Trader Joe’s has nice bouquets) but get yourself some flowers. I like a little color in mine, but you do you.

I’m going on a little run this weekend to get myself flowers (and chocolate, see below) at my favorite local shops. Maybe you want to get yours delivered?

Fancy chocolates are a great way to pamper yourself and Be Your Own Valentine. Box of four fancy dark chocolate truffles with gold foil and sparkles

2. Bestow yourself with fancy chocolate

Fancy chocolates, anyone? The kind that you eat one and it takes twenty minutes? Those. Order them from a local shop and get them delivered.

Or maybe rich hot chocolate is more your scene? Very nice. Add a little cinnamon and chili pepper to that chocolat chaud, because you are hot.

And, there’s always this chocolate cake, now in mini version (and horror movies—my Valentine’s Day celebration of choice).

A forkful of rich dark chocolate cake Gâteau au Chocolat Fondant de Nathalie. The rest of the slice of cake is visible on a floral plate in the background

3. Bubbles!

Celebrate kicking the winter blahs with champagne. You can get a split, or a Piccolo (one glass), at good wine shops. Get the best you can afford.

There are non-alcoholic festive options, too. The point is to have some fizz and fun.

Proper stemware, please. Put on some classical music and sip.

4. Baubles!

What about a little jewelry or a scarf? Or maybe just a little something that makes yourself feel luxurious? It doesn’t need to be Tiffany’s to count, just something that makes you happy. Visit your favorite shop and get yourself a little treat. Get it giftwrapped.

5. Take a bath and go to bed early

Another kind of bubbles (maybe drink some bubbles, too?), a bath soothes the soul. Some candles. Essential oils. Hang a little Eucalyptus. Listen to relaxing music. Go to bed early. Talk about pampering yourself!

6. Take yourself out to dinner

That place you’ve been wanting to try? Make a reservation for one and take yourself out on a date. Dress nicely, sit up straight (no phone!), eat slowly, and get dessert. Taking yourself out to dinner is one of life’s great pleasures, and it’s one of my favorite ways to pamper myself. 

7. Take yourself to a movie

Can I just tell you how much I want to go to a movie again? I love, love, love going to the movies by myself. I pick the movie, the seat, and the snacks. As with dinner above, I’m thinking that with the decrease in cases means that it’s time to do this again.

I love to go to the Brattle Theatre, a local arthouse cinema (the Brattle was also a pioneer in the arthouse movement, opening in Harvard Square in the early 1950s). If you have an independent cinema, especially an old-fashioned one, this is an ideal spot for a solo date.

8. Indulge in a massage (or even better, get monthly massages)

One of the best things I ever did for myself was sign up for a Groupon for a massage a number of years ago. Aside from the worst of Covid and the recent spike, I’ve had monthly massages ever since. Once a month, early Friday evening, I head into Boston and the cares of the month disappear.

Massages are a definite splurge, but they are good for you. Many practices have subscriptions that offer discounts. If it’s something you can do, I highly recommend them.

9. Hire someone to deep clean your home (and get monthly cleanings)

On a slightly different track, there’s nothing quite like not having to do the deep cleaning yourself. Hiring someone to come in and do a deep clean will cross something off your list and make you feel so much better. And might convince you to sign up for monthly cleanings. Keeping up with cleaning is so much easier when you’ve had a fresh start.

Don’t go with one of those big chains to get housekeeping—those tend to be exploitive. Find someone who has their own business, or has a small local company, and pay them fairly.

What are your favorite ways to pamper yourself?

These are just a few ideas of ways to pamper yourself in the deep dark days of winter. What are your favorites? Share below in the comments!

This post is part of the the Happily Single series. Please suggest topics and visit the Happily Single page for posts and other resources. A few posts from the series below!